Write-up By Stu
I must admit, I woke up on Saturday morning thinking there was a possibility that we might be cancelled or transferred given the amount of rain we had during the week. However, a quick look at the capital football website confirmed no cancellation or transfer, so it was game on (home game for Jase) and the Elite were looking forward to putting a couple of wins together and hold on to a top four position on the table.
As I arrived at the ground, the pitch looked to be in pretty good nick given the rain during the week (Where is Jase?). A bit wet around the outer of the pitch, but not too bad (Where is Jase?). The grass was even cut to a respectable level, so we could expect some good footy! Has anyone seen Jase? Not quite like Newtown number 1 or the turf so we all expected a few bobbles today. The Gaffer came prepared for a mud bath by donning his Red Band Gummies! Where is Jase?
We warmed up well and had a pretty good goal scoring ratio in our traditional warm up ‘shooting drill’. Oh and Jase arrived. We formed our usual pre-game huddle and spoke about keeping it simple, playing to feet and getting in early to keep the momentum going. There was some tall timber in the opposing side and with Ganzey out, our team height average had dropped somewhat.
We were in fact the polar opposite unfortunately, flat, quiet, lacked movement and not as eager to get to the 50/50’s as Tawa were. And sure enough they got the go ahead goal with some nice movement through the mid field and out wide, up to the front. Bang 1 nil Tawa.
We even had an actual referee for our game, which is a luxury that we usually don’t get. Some pretty interesting calls throughout the match and pretty quick to blow his whistle on any appeal that the Tawa lads made, no excuses though. I would say it was the same for both, but it didn’t really feel that way. Maybe I am too biased. Niall! Please do not appeal for offsides ‘You think your right because you are British’ one of the Tawa players muttered. Only to get a barrage from Niall, the Gaffer and of course I couldn’t keep my mouth shut. So a few 2 cent coins were lobbed his way. He actually apologised minutes later.
We battled to get back into the game, with a few changes of personal from both teams. The Tawa change towards the end of the first half seemed to do them more harm than good. It opened up more space on the left flank for us and we pushed really hard to create an opportunity to get back in the game and square up the match. No luck though, as we headed into the half time break still trailing by a goal.
The discussions were around closing down a few of their problem players, particularly some of the wide and central mid field players who seemed to have plenty of time and space on the ball. The rest of the game became a bit of a blur, a second goal to Tawa, a soft penalty that they converted and not to long after that a fourth to well and truly put us out of touch. We were out played by a team that adjusted to the conditions better, and purely wanted it more than us. We are a better team than the team that turned out on Saturday. It was one of those games for the Elite. It must be that away strip!
I don’t even remember who scored the goal for us…. Someone who is clearly so humble they don’t want to be known – good on you! Dave made a number of good saves and played pretty well although the score line didn’t reflect that. A special mention to the lads that helped us out on the weekend, Luke and Broadie – Cheers!
Heads up for our next challenge on Monday night boys, hopefully we will be back to winning football! Sorry not much to write about after this games lads, so I have included a post Premier League wrap up.
MVP points go to
Steveo - 3 points
Battled hard all game and didn’t give in. Organised as best as he could and never gave an inch in the tackle.
Dec’s - 2 points
Again played really hard all game, but didn’t get the rub of the green.
Humble – 1 point
The guy who scored our goal.
Given there was not much to write about, here is a review of the premier league, players, teams and coaches. Well the funny stuff anyway. Niall’s Gilet also got a mention, do you still fashion that bad boy Niall?
Giving a manager time is pointless
‘Give him time,’ is the battle cry that rings out whenever a manager is struggling, but the last person that policy worked for is Alex Ferguson nearly 30 years ago. This time United did the right thing and ripped the plaster off early by sacking David Moyes.
Managers should not be in technical areas...
Most Newcastle fans think that Alan Pardew should be nowhere near their technical area. Hull’s David Meyler would agree, after receiving an extreme close-up of Pardew’s forehead.
But touchline bans do work
Among the stupider things ever to happen on Tyneside was Pardew picking up a seven-game ban for that pathetic butt. The players decided they couldn’t be bothered if he wasn’t there and promptly lost every game bar one.
Gilets are a bad thing
That famous gilet made Proper Football Man Tim Sherwood look like a Proper Football Idiot, but since Mourinho adopted this foolish fashion item, there is a real danger of kids at home copying it.
Tony Pulis really is a football genius
When Ian Holloway resigned, Palace had four points from 11 games and looked certainties for the drop. Enter another polarising managerial personality and the rest, for Crystal Pulis, is history.
Luis Suarez is redeemable...
Forget the biting and the racially-charged insults. This was the season Suarez proved there is no finer striker in England: powerful, graceful and supremely clinical.
But Fernando Torres is not
Not even Chelsea’s greatest ever manager can get more than 10 goals from the £50 million man. Makes Marouane Fellaini look like a bargain.
Manchester United are just like any other club
Not a sacking club? No, you wouldn’t be after 20 years of unprecedented success. But then no other club in Europe would put up with a slip from champions-by-11 to seventh in the league.
Jose Mourinho will never change
‘The Happy One’? Really? A couple of smiley summer press conferences soon gave way to the usual winter mix of snide comments, foundation-less blasts and no-shows.
In World Cup years, play better in the second half of the season
In autumn, Andros Townsend was the brightest star in England’s firmament. Now he’s not even a speck, thanks to a chronic lack of form and, more recently, fitness and injury.
Yaya Toure is the best player in the Premier League
There are midfield powerhouses, and then there is Yaya. Takes him a while to get going, but when he gets that huge frame moving forward with the ball, he’s like a tank. You can keep your Suarez.
Romelu Lukaku is the best striker Chelsea never had
Everton have won the hearts of neutrals with the high-scoring, attractive football. At the centre of Roberto Martínez’s team is the 17-goal striker whom Jose Mourinho doesn’t seem to rate much.
Sacking your manager is no guarantee of success
Swansea, Sunderland and Palace all showed their manager the door and pulled off escape acts, but sackings were less effective at Cardiff and Norwich. Still, Fulham proved that sacking your manager twice definitely isn’t the best way to go.
Tom Cleverley is not the British Xavi, despite what he says...
Rather than kicking on and becoming England’s answer to Xavi, as he claimed, Tom Cleverley’s career has gone as sideways as one of his passes. This summer will be make or break for the midfielder at Old Trafford. Probably break.
Neither is Joe Allen
Despite being named after the excellent American restaurant in London’s Covent Garden, Joe Allen has failed to live up to the hype as either a midfield magician or a purveyor of fine steaks.
Gareth Barry and James Milner may be England's two best players
For positional sense, game management and footballing intelligence you would be hard pushed to find two more astute English players than James Milner and Gareth Barry.
Christian Benteke - one season wonder
Remember him? Last season he was touted as the answer to every big club’s thirst for more goals. He signed a new contract at Villa and promptly gave up scoring, staying fit and a World Cup spot.
Michael Laudrup was always too cool for the Premier League
Given the opprobrium thrown at Pep Guardiola lately, one has to wonder how much of the affection shown to Swansea last season was because of their possession-based football rather than the biggest man-crush the Premier League has ever known.
Can’t afford good players? Loan them instead
Isn’t Roberto Martinez a clever chap? Miserly Everton would never shell out on big names so the manager brought in Romelu Lukaku and Gareth Barry on loan instead and laughed his way to fifth place.
Beware the power of Michael Jackson (Fulham statue)
Fulham remove Michael Jackson statue. Fulham get relegated. Not a coincidence says former owner Mohamed Fayed: “ The statue was a charm. We removed the luck from the club and now we have to pay the price.”
Jack Wilshere is sadly overrated
Where once the claim “World Class Wilshere” was a proud boast for fans of Arsenal and England, it increasingly feels like an ironic jibe. World Class Physio Outpatient, maybe.
Manchester City are boring under Manuel Pellegrini
The Premier League has been spoiled by Roberto Mancini in the last few years with a regular supply of bust-ups with Mario Balotelli, Carlos Tevez, fellow managers and anyone he could get angry at. Manuel Pellegrini is just a bit dull.
Newcastle fans are the most deluded in the Premier League
Yes, Newcastle lost six matches in a row. Yes, their manager headbutted an opposition player. But they had secured a top-half finish way back in February. Surely that’s worth being a laughing stock for.
Managing Manchester United is not the same as managing Everton
Oh Moyesie. Would that it were. Maybe the cruellest cut of all in his Old Trafford Nightmare ™: Everton are now better than when he was in charge. Oh.
Being Good Football Man (Sherwood etc) does not make you good football manager
A Good Football Man (trans: someone, English by definition, who the pundit played alongside) has been one of the talking-head cliches of the season. None of the GFM can coach, though.
Fourth really is as good as a trophy (judging from Arsenal’s celebrations)
Whatever else you say about Arsene, the magnificent PR campaign he waged to get fourth placed recognised as a huge achievement rather than a failure shows that famous big brain is still working well.
Even when the EPL sucks at least it’s not the Scottish Prem
They used to sneer that it was a two-horse race. Not any more. And the standard of play is slipping year on year.
Chelsea still hate ballboys
Last year Eden Hazard booted a ballboy at Swansea and this year Jose Mourinho warned a Crystal Palace youngster to stop time-wasting or Cesar Azpilicueta would punch him. What do Chelsea have against children fetching footballs?
We still don’t fully understand a quenelle
It took a bunch of French journalists to inform us of Nicolas Anelka’s goal celebration, the FA spent weeks deciding what its significance was, yet still no one is sure what it all means.
A glorious ending is never guaranteed
Manchester City v Liverpool v Chelsea fighting for the title, Arsenal v Everton battling for fourth, half a dozen teams trying to avoid relegation. And yet there was nothing to play for on the final day.