Round 17 VS LH Mooseknuckles, Newtown Park 2, 12 August

Wellington United Elite 6 – 1 Lower Hutt City

Write-up by Rori.
 
Ummmm ok there is something not right here second game of the season and we got pummelled by the cellar dwellers, on reflection we were a few chromosomes short of a jellyfish in goal and probably could have done better placing a couch in goal so we waited 19 long weeks for this game.
 
The email comes out from CJ right lads putting our best 11 forward to start we need revenge playing the coveted 3-5-2 formation be there at 11.40. Saturday morning 11.30 I show up and the biggest shock of the game Turk is the freaking early, this is either a good sign or a really bad sign. Right lads lets warm up, oh boy this is looking good Tim & Jay two of the starting 11 are MIA and henry is nowhere to be seen, manager Dave is frantically calling around as we double check we have 11 to kick off, phew don’t worry Lads we have 12 while the opposition has 10 and a 10 year old.
 
Jay calls in he decided to go visit the hockey turfs on Glenmore st he will be here ASAP, Ahh here is the oppositions keeper right we have a game on our hands once the keeper kits up, oh Sh*t Tim sends a message he is having a freaking milkshake at some café with his Angus replacement (Seriously Tim moving on from Angus so quick).
 
Eventually we kicked off with Dave on the whistle, a back and forth first half as the Elite settled and started to take control, the first goal coming from what looked like some brilliant passing around the top of the box that was in reality some pinball with everyone swinging at it and the ball popping out to the top of the box where an angry Decs bleeding from receiving an elbow to the nose decides to welly it harnessing the Irish red mist straight into the back of the net before promptly running to the side-line to clean his face up while refusing a sub as the opposition jokingly (I think) says they refused to tackle him due to the blood.
 
A bit more back and forth as the opposition didn’t really look like challenging the Elite goal with our back 3 led by the vocal Stevo cleaning pretty much everything up, the other highlights of the first half were Nicks first kick out from goal going straight in the air and landing just outside the box while Decs shouts “encouragement” to Nick to do better and Greg shouts “encouragement” to Decs to stop shouting “encouragement” and face the play.
 
With the end of the first half approaching one of the Lower Hutt midfielders decided they had had enough kicking the ball and flapped at it with his wings like a mentally impaired chicken, up steps CJ the set piece kick of Newtown 2 whipping in a ferocious free kick aiming for Stevo at the back post who comes in head first and the balls in the back of the net elite 2-0.
 
Half time hey Tim showed up!! Still no Henry guessing he decided he enjoys fines more than footy, Oh ok looks like the opposition got some reinforcements in the shape of two young lads, one has more beads in his hair than a Taxi drivers therapeutic car seat. Team talk work hard, watch the new guys blah blah LETS GET IT.
 
Gainsy steps into goal and the opposition changes shape to the coveted 3-3-4 formation throwing everything they have up front to be shortly rewarded with a long range goal with the ball up in the sun Gainsy had no chance, although he says he did it purposely to keep his name on the nuddy run list, a quick formation change to bring another man into the backline rightened the ship but we were still having trouble up front with getting the ball in the midfield and trying to play over the defence for our strikers to run onto which wasn’t working, in comes some tactical genius throwing Jay up front to start running rings around people and quickly we were up 4-1 after two quick goals through good team play, the opposition put there heads down and we banged in another 2 but not before Greg got upset with circles being run round him and promptly chopped the playmaker on the opposition grinning as he walked away.
 
Final score 6-1 with goals to Decs x2, CJ, Greg, Adam and one still being contested in the Clubbies, Stevo claiming he got a touch to the free kick while CJ claims it was already over the line.
 
Points
Jase 3 – Outstanding shift, couple of early giveaways in the first half but a man on fire at the back absolutely dominating everything near him
Roger 2 – A massive shift in a back 3 up against a two or three lads that broke like lightning
Jay 1 – shook off some early rust to come alive second half